What's the longest you've ever gone without bathing? Why? What are your feelings on feeling dirty?

Two months. Let's just say too much recreational chemistry, not enough adult supervision. I don't feel dirty until I stink, or have a noticeable change in tint.

10 minutes. I lost track of time.

One and a half days. I felt slimy and smelly, not good after a full night of drinking. My hair got all frizzy. It sucked - never again.

Ah dirt. I've recently learned the joys of filth. I'll wash my face twice a day, but man, since I've discovered that I don't actually need to shower every day, I only do when my hair can no longer pass for hair.

In my adult life seven days. On a dare I once went an entire summer without washing my hair.

By myself or with the servants help? I don't like to to touch myself, so I allow others to do it. I don't mind being dirty.

Three days, it was so gross.

Two weeks.

I guess about a week. I don't remember going that long but I'm sure it's happened. I used to be a shower every day kinda gal but now it's every two days. Blame my roommate. She's a bad (good?) influence.

Sometimes you have to stop scrubbing to really get to know yourself again.

Oh God, probably a week while camping. It sucks, I hate being dirty - but then again nothing is better than a long, hot shower when you're at your grimiest.

Probably four days - as a child. As an adult, two. Maybe three. I hate feeling dirty but after a certain point I kind of revel in it.

When I was a freshmen in high school I went a week without showering or brushing my teeth just to see what it was like. I'm a pretty clean person (shower at least once a day). Sometimes feeling dirty is okay if I just worked for 12 hours or something, but I'm very aware of cleanliness when it comes to sex. I don't want my dick to be all cheezy and I certainly don't want no stank puss.

Four days. I was camping. I don't mind being dirty as long as I know I will be able to shower again one day.

Two or maybe three days tops. Sailing. Yuck. I hate not being able to shower.

Three days. I think I just didn't want to listen to the echo in the bathroom. I usually feel dirty from situations and stuff, rather than dirt being on my bod. Weird.

Probably three days, I'm not big on being dirty. I just don't feel fresh without a shower. Normally I shower every day, before I go out, without fail.

Probably just a day or two (unless I'm sick). I don't mind being dirty. I like that feeling after exercise, it makes my workout seem better. I have never understood those women who feel the need to put on make-up before going to the gym.

11 Days. I was biking across Tibet, riding at 17,500 ft above sea level. It's a dry climate up there.

Three days, laziness, not good.

Six days, seven nights. Lost on a desert island. Dirt's okay, but it's more fun when you're hanging with Anne Heche.

Filth? I'm soaking in it.

 

What's your dream career? Do you plan to pursue it? Maybe you're already doing it?

Vice President. I like to travel, but I also like government work and meeting people. I'm tall.

Cardiologist, once I make some money I will pursue it. My current job does not pay enough to even consider medicine.

I'd love to be a continuity checker (editor?) in film. I'm always spotting mistakes in movies and it drives me insane. No plans on pursuing it.

I am afraid of success.

I walk into an office, but it's not an office, it's a pantry and my mom's my boss, only it's not really my mom it's Carla from "Cheers," and she's not my boss, she's my secretary and I sell Milk Duds on the phone but they all turn into ants just when I'm about to eat them and wait, this isn't what you meant is it?

Being a wildly successful magazine publisher with several side projects like a gallery affiliated with my magazine that my twin sister runs. That seems both aspirational and doable and that's the best part. Oh yeah, I want to make tons o' cash.

It changes weekly.

My dream career doesn't matter. When my father dies, I will take over the kingdom and dreams do not figure into it.

Kung Fu Cop. Hell, yes.

Inaction is its own reward.

To create communication courses for people who are communicatively challenged in relationships. Yes, I have plans and am in process with them.

Getting paid to masturbate.

I'm pursuing it - getting my novel published and being a full-time mom. I NEVER thought I'd have said that last part.

I want to get paid to direct web video shows. Currently, I don't get paid to do it.

Hermit. I am pursuing it strenuously.

I want to do it all! But definitely within the realm of entertainment.

Side Show Freak promoter. I am currently doing it part time.

Trophy wife sounds good. I do want to have some cash, but nothing I really want to do provides that. Art historian, Art critic for a cool mag (like MASH), owner of a stylish gallery ... are we catching the theme here?

Whatever it was that rich lifelong scholars did a century ago. Well ... I'm sort of doing it, except for the rich part ...

Railroad Baron.

What's your favorite swear word or phrase?

Motherfucker

Rats. Charlie Brown and the Peanuts gang use it well, and it holds up to the tired phrase "Good Grief."

CUNT. But I like to ask a question. You start off nice and slow and all polite and bam you hit him with the word CUNT. Like, "Why are you such a CUNT?" It's always a good shocker. That or jumping up and down while you point at someone is fun, too.

Fuckwad.

Jesus mother fucking Christ is good, but I also like cum-gurgling whore when referring to suck-ups of either gender.

Freaking whore, or any denomination of fuck.

Nothin' says it like "fuck." It can be used in all manners of speech, i.e. noun, verb, etc. And it can be a good thing or bad.

Fuck you.

Friggin idiot.

Son of a bitch. You bastard.

Fuckface.

Cocksucker, though I'm a big fan of fuck and asswipe.

That's a rat fuck!

Plook. It means to fuck.

Syphilis dripping vaginal blood fart.

FUCK!

There's really nothing like the f word, but I love freaking too, also friggin', an under-used implied curse word that goes a long way in my book.

Fuck or Goddamn FUCK! (accompanied by my jumping up and down).

Do you believe in an afterlife? What do you think it might be like?

Nope.

There is no "after" life perhaps, but life continues, changing - quite possibly for the better, one must think.

No. Sleep with no dreams

Yeah, sure.

Completely and utterly void of anything. Welcome to the lack of existence.

Yes, I do. Energy never ceases. It just takes a different form. I have no idea what it will be like. If I did, I would be there. Hmmmm?

Yes. I do believe in the afterlife. I believe the first year of the afterlife is reliving past sins. All the bad things that you've done. The time your cursed at your mother or ran over the neighbor's dog Sparky and then tried to clean his body parts.

It's a nice idea, but I doubt it. And I gotta admit, the idea of doing anything for an eternity is awful. I'm pretty sure you're just dead. You won't know, so what does it matter?

No.

Yes. Praise be to Allah. Praise to Mohammed.

Yes, one's afterlife depends on what kind of person you are when you are alive three times. If you are mean your afterlife will be three times more miserable than you could imagine. If you led a good life you will be surrounded with all the things that make you happy.

I dunno. I guess I want to. Maybe I believe in reincarnation in some sort of way. You're not allowed to make fun of me for that though.

I'm not sure that I believe in one. I recently converted to Christianity and am still ironing out the details.

Yes, but I have no idea what it would be like. It would be cool if people were reincarnated into pets and the people who were good could choose their owners before they were brought back to life.

Ask me after I'm dead.

Yes and no. I think that everyone comes back into existence, but as to an "afterlife," no, I think it's more like "afterlimbo" just hanging waiting to return.

Yes. I think it's a lot like here and now, but less chaotic. I think you just advance to a notch above where you are until you eventually end up united with everything.

If there is one its probably nothing like religious zealots think it is.

I hope to god there's no such thing.

 

Can anyone possibly tell us what Nacho cheese is? Seriously now, what is this mysterious cheese?

Huh, that never occurred to me before. The actual cheese used to make "nacho" cheese. Well, I'm sure it has nothing organic in it. I once knew a girl who honestly insisted Velveeta was her favorite cheese. So glad I don't know her anymore.

Processed shit that tastes like shit.

Any cheese you make nachos with, be that cheddar, jack, cheese whiz ... whatever.

Nacho cheese is the nectar of some exotic flower - or it should be if it's not.

Salt, salt and orange coloring.

And he said "That's nacho cheese, that's nacho cheese"... get it? [Editor's note: no.]

Pure and simple deliciousness - Umami in a can.

Not sure. Cheese Whiz type cheese served with nachos? very unsure.

I know not of this cheese that you speak. Where can it be found?

I am as perplexed as you.

Salt and bacon fat.

Nacho cheese is actually orange-colored Rubber Cement, heated until it runs.

I think it's Play-do heated up so that it develops a gooey consistency. Maybe that is why it's always served warm.

I think it actually is a variety of pepper-infused cheese from Mexico, but it could be anything.

Creamy processed goodness.

There's an ancient and revered Nacho Way of Knowledge, you are not ready.

Yes. It is actually a cheese product and yes you can get it in certain markets around town.

It's in that category with "nougat". There are no recipes for it, yet it's definitely created ...

It is chemically balanced, extremely processed food, generally sold in convenience stores, and will most likely be our only form of sustenance after nuclear war.

I live in Wisconsin.